Being 9 months pregnant is no picnic, any mother who remembers will tell you. I say "who remembers", because I know that these days will quickly get blurred into obscurity after the baby arrives. Bringing a baby into the world is such a monumental change, it tends to eclipse what came before it. Yes, even if you've done it all before.
I'd wager that no woman in Texas history has ever been sorry to have a summer baby arrive a little early. It's hot out there. But this post isn't supposed to be about complaining--there are actually some things I'm enjoying at 9 months pregnant, and I feel like that's worth writing about. Here they are, in no particular order:
1. The slow pace. I am not one to naturally take life slowly. It usually takes a force beyond my control to consistently slow me down. In this case, I am physically limited. I can't plan an action-packed day or weekend, because I know I just don't have the stamina to get through it. I can do relatively easy things, slowly. I have to take breaks. I can't take on big projects, or plan vacations (except in the distant future). Lucky for me, I have a very supportive and understanding husband who has adapted to the situation and makes sure I get a break from the kids in the evenings. He's taking them to the YMCA every evening while I read, or go for a short walk, or just relax. Since I've been on maternity leave, I've watched seasons 1-4 of Downton Abbey and read an entire book so far. I'm on my next book now.
2. Sweet moments with my daughters. We are coming upon the end of an era, and the days of just Natalie and Rachel and me feel sweeter for it. I enjoy their laughter, smiles, silly and cuddly moments. I can't read to both of them in my lap anymore, but they've adapted. Things are relatively simple and easy with them right now, and they're nowhere near as high-maintenance as a baby will be. I know that and I treasure it.
3. The scenery. June may be uncomfortably hot and humid in Austin, but it sure is pretty, especially this year. All the Crape Myrtles at my house and around town are bursting with blooms this year. Everything looks lush and vibrant. The "jungle" look is still here--it's not hot or dry enough to chase that away yet. Sure, there are mosquitos, but I can sit on the back porch among the citronella candles and incense and be comfortable enough. The garden is in maintenance mode at this point, both because I'm so far along and because the season is--this is the gardener's respite between busy seasons, except for watering, which hasn't been too demanding yet this year. I get to sit back, relax and enjoy.
4. Nesting. Though it's tiring, nesting is also fun for me. I spent four days last week preparing big-batch crockpot meals, serving them to the family at dinner, and squirreling away the leftovers in the freezer for after baby's arrival. After four days, I was ready for a couple of days of take-out, but it was fun to get into the groove of preparing meals. I have tackled a few small cleaning and organizing projects. I've taken in some baby toys and gear. The bassinet is ready to go. My bag is packed for the birthing center. Doing all of that was exciting, something to focus on while anticipating an exciting change.
5. Sleep. I'm so close to holding this baby in my arms, I can taste it. But the sleepless nights haven't set in yet. I'm still in the stage of sweet anticipation. Okay, I'm not sleeping like a champ--I still wake up at least once a night, and turning over is not comfortable. But I can get back to sleep and get in a reasonable number of hours. When my girls are napping, I can (and do) take at least a power nap. Sleeping in, when I can get away with it, feels great.
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Tuesday, June 17, 2014
Reflections at 9 Months Pregnant
As of this week, I am 37 weeks pregnant, just over the 9-month mark, settling into the true home stretch. 37 weeks is always a welcome sight, as any delivery prior to that would automatically land baby in the Neonatal ICU, an experience I wouldn't wish to repeat or for my child to experience. Not that NICUs don't have their important purposes; it's just that my experience with Natalie in the NICU left a sour taste.
When Rachel was born, I was keenly intent on securing for myself and my child a birth experience that was the complete opposite of Natalie's: spontaneous, intervention-free to the extent possible, with little to no separation of mother and child, and a quick return home. I got everything I wanted in Rachel's birth, and a lot of healing, too. Even my chronic sciatica and related pelvic alignment issues resolved. I was very prepared, with a doula and my husband and parents and even a few neighbors ready to pitch in and help with childcare or any other support we needed.
This time around, going back to Austin Area Birthing Center felt like an obvious choice--we'd had such a good experience there with Rachel, there was no sense in changing anything.
I've realized, gradually, that I haven't put the same level of intention into the birth experience this time. I feel like I'm adequately prepared--the bassinet and carseat are ready to go, I have stocked up on diapers, receiving blankets, and all the birth-day necessities. My little suitcase is packed. We don't have a doula this time, but my husband and parents and neighbors are standing by. The girls are considerably older than Natalie was when Rachel was born, and they understand what's coming and can be of genuine help if they choose. They're capable of getting things for themselves, taking care of their own basic needs, and entertaining themselves and each other. That alone is a huge difference between this time and last.
Still, it occurs to me that every birth is different. Last time, true labor started at around 7AM, which was just about perfect--I hadn't had a wonderful night's sleep, but I had slept, and I went into the whole process with about as much energy as I could possibly have. I delivered her in the jacuzzi at 12:30PM. Rachel was born just 2 days before her due date, which is pretty ideal timing. There were a few funky details--we had to take a couple of extra precautions to avoid my transmitting Group B Strep to her, and she had some facial bruising following the delivery that made for some discoloration and swelling we had to keep an eye on. She was on jaundice watch at home, but she never developed jaundice. Otherwise, her birth was about as easy as I could have possibly hoped for. Nursing was uncomfortable at first, but she gained weight and we gradually improved at it until it was truly easy.
This time, any number of things could be different. I could go into labor at the end of the day and deliver in the middle of the night. Labor could take longer. Labor could come on and progress so quickly that we don't make it to the birthing center in time. There could be a train stalled on the train tracks between my house and the birthing center (a remote, but real possibility). This little baby boy could be significantly bigger or smaller than the girls (though no one has expressed concern about his size either way). The baby or I could develop some sort of complication that would necessitate a hospital transport, even a C-section or a NICU stay. Anything could happen.
I'll try to expect the unexpected, prepare for the worst and hope for the best. I'm truly not worried; I just feel like I am better prepared if I consider a range of possibilities. Cautious optimism, you could call it.
I've had bouts of Braxton Hicks contractions and aches and sudden pains that stop me in my tracks, on and off since my last prenatal appointment. I can't know for sure, but it feels like my body is preparing itself earlier this time. I don't know whether or not that will mean a birth well before the due date. Perhaps being in my third pregnancy, I just know my body's signs more acutely.
However he makes his entrance to the world, I very much look forward to meeting him, to look at his alien newborn face, to search his eyes, to stroke his soft hair, to gaze at his tiny articulated fingers.
When Rachel was born, I was keenly intent on securing for myself and my child a birth experience that was the complete opposite of Natalie's: spontaneous, intervention-free to the extent possible, with little to no separation of mother and child, and a quick return home. I got everything I wanted in Rachel's birth, and a lot of healing, too. Even my chronic sciatica and related pelvic alignment issues resolved. I was very prepared, with a doula and my husband and parents and even a few neighbors ready to pitch in and help with childcare or any other support we needed.
This time around, going back to Austin Area Birthing Center felt like an obvious choice--we'd had such a good experience there with Rachel, there was no sense in changing anything.
I've realized, gradually, that I haven't put the same level of intention into the birth experience this time. I feel like I'm adequately prepared--the bassinet and carseat are ready to go, I have stocked up on diapers, receiving blankets, and all the birth-day necessities. My little suitcase is packed. We don't have a doula this time, but my husband and parents and neighbors are standing by. The girls are considerably older than Natalie was when Rachel was born, and they understand what's coming and can be of genuine help if they choose. They're capable of getting things for themselves, taking care of their own basic needs, and entertaining themselves and each other. That alone is a huge difference between this time and last.
Still, it occurs to me that every birth is different. Last time, true labor started at around 7AM, which was just about perfect--I hadn't had a wonderful night's sleep, but I had slept, and I went into the whole process with about as much energy as I could possibly have. I delivered her in the jacuzzi at 12:30PM. Rachel was born just 2 days before her due date, which is pretty ideal timing. There were a few funky details--we had to take a couple of extra precautions to avoid my transmitting Group B Strep to her, and she had some facial bruising following the delivery that made for some discoloration and swelling we had to keep an eye on. She was on jaundice watch at home, but she never developed jaundice. Otherwise, her birth was about as easy as I could have possibly hoped for. Nursing was uncomfortable at first, but she gained weight and we gradually improved at it until it was truly easy.
This time, any number of things could be different. I could go into labor at the end of the day and deliver in the middle of the night. Labor could take longer. Labor could come on and progress so quickly that we don't make it to the birthing center in time. There could be a train stalled on the train tracks between my house and the birthing center (a remote, but real possibility). This little baby boy could be significantly bigger or smaller than the girls (though no one has expressed concern about his size either way). The baby or I could develop some sort of complication that would necessitate a hospital transport, even a C-section or a NICU stay. Anything could happen.
I'll try to expect the unexpected, prepare for the worst and hope for the best. I'm truly not worried; I just feel like I am better prepared if I consider a range of possibilities. Cautious optimism, you could call it.
I've had bouts of Braxton Hicks contractions and aches and sudden pains that stop me in my tracks, on and off since my last prenatal appointment. I can't know for sure, but it feels like my body is preparing itself earlier this time. I don't know whether or not that will mean a birth well before the due date. Perhaps being in my third pregnancy, I just know my body's signs more acutely.
However he makes his entrance to the world, I very much look forward to meeting him, to look at his alien newborn face, to search his eyes, to stroke his soft hair, to gaze at his tiny articulated fingers.
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